One of the things that I most look forward to these days is when my grandchildren can come to visit. Because I’m on steroids (combating another bout of the allergic reaction pneumonia that I first experienced last fall, I’m somewhat immune suppressed. That means if the kids are not at the peak of health, we have to pass and not see them that week. It’s hard when that happens because we so look forward to it but we know it is better to wait and stay as well as possible.
We’re blessed to have children (both my daughter and son-in-law) who sincerely want their parents to be a present factor in the lives of their children. They go out of their way to make opportunities for both sets of grandparents to spend true quality time with the little ones.
I was lucky enough to be both well and have the time and energy to help out when my grandson had issues shortly after birth. He had successful heart surgery at age six weeks but needed someone to watch him during the days while he recovered and caught up with his abilities.
To have him five days a week and be able to really help him make progress in recovery is a memory I will always cherish. He’s almost five and the days of catching up are long behind him. He plays puzzles and Legos and likes to watch superheroes with us. He is especially drawn to my husband and my husband to him as well. It must be the Lego bond.
When my granddaughter was born, the kids had established a nice pattern of letting each set of grandparents take a grandchild one day per week so we could time with each child on their own. We alternated children/week and it was wonderful. On weekends, we would usually get to spend a couple of hours with both grandchildren at the same time (though at their home instead of at ours.)
My granddaughter is a beautiful and loving little one. Right from the start, just holding her relaxed me and gave me rest. She is definitely a delight for me to talk to and to play with. At almost two and a half, she likes to wear my jewelry, watch her Nana exercise, play puzzles and Lego Duplos when she visits. She also likes to get tastes of my lunch though hers is always much more appealing but after all, Nana’s food has to be good as well!
These days, the kids come to us as I have to be extremely careful about what outside environment factors I’m exposed to. They make the time and the effort to keep our relationships together. I know that it isn’t always easy and that it takes time away from their own family time. There simply aren’t enough words and ways to say thank you to them.
Being a grandparent is so different from being a parent. The heavy lifting is for someone else. The enjoyment of spending time with a child takes over and, maybe because we are in our second childhood, fun and games seem just about right.
As a parent, I had to consider everything. I needed to make sure my children did not get exposed to bad things and, if somehow they did, I needed to be ready to set in and intervene. I must admit that as a grandparent, this would still apply, at least for me. It is so easy for children to be caught up in things of this world rather than in loving and serving God.
It is in the family that the real order of things important in life must be set. It is a heavy responsibility but, apart from serving God, it is the most important one for an individual to have. If a parent puts God first, they will be able to raise their children according to his purpose.
My parents did not, unfortunately, have this outlook and I and my siblings undoubtedly suffered for it. I was a little bit better but as I worked ridiculous hours, I wasn’t as present in my children’s lives as I should have been. They surely suffered for that as well.
It’s a real blessing to see my daughter’s family. They are Christians and are raising their children to love God. What a difference it is already making compared to what I’ve seen and heard in my life.
It makes it easier for me to know that, should something happen to me earlier than I would like, my special little ones are so well taken care of. Not only with such loving parents but also with my son-in-law’s parents as well. His mother is a lovely sister of mine in Christ and just knowing that she is and will be part of the kids lives sets my mind at peace. She’s also very skilled in crafts and needlearts and will certainly teach the kids those skills as I will myself if I am given the time.
I would never have thought that life could turn around so quickly from the difficult days of my youth to such a beautiful and wonderful life for my family. I praise God daily for letting me see and experience this in my lifetime.
He has been good and kind to me when I did not deserve it. He loved me and guided me even when I was his enemy. His love is more than abundant. It is there for us just waiting to find it. He is my Father and it is he who teaches me, just like a child, to know and experience the real order of life. With God first, all things will come into proper order.
That isn’t to say that there are glitches along the way. It seems like every time I start looking at life by the Vicki perspective, I’m inclined to fall off of the path that God has set for me. It is so easy to start thinking of the way I think things should be. I have to constantly remind myself that I have to lean on God and not try to make life decisions without him. When the me in the equation starts getting too big, the results start skewing.
It’s taken most of a lifetime but I am finally able (most of the time) to step back and put myself into proper perspective. If I fail to note I’m putting my thoughts ahead of those of God, I have a wonderful husband who brings it promptly to my attention.
These days, I spend my time getting stronger. I’m eating better than I have in years and, as my daughter told me, though I’m really ill, I’m also in the best condition I have been for a long time. What diametrically opposed results! Only God could set this up. I’m learning to relax and to let him have his way in my life instead of trying to figure out what it is that I’m supposed to do.
I’ve found that letting God reign is the best way to live. What he asks, I’ll do, even when it seems more difficult than I could imagine. And when it turns out that I am able to do what I thought impossible, I give glory to God for the work he has done in me. It’s not me but a reflection of his love and order that shows through me.
Praise God for his plan even when it doesn’t make sense, when you can’t see your way, when all seems dark or so messed up that it can’t be fixed. He is working with you and for you. Give him your life and do as he asks and you too will become a reflection of his love to others.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.