Life is hectic. It seems like everyday, more and more piles up and gets backtracked and sometimes, simply shoved away and forgotten. It is the “high priority” list that is most likely to be accomplished. That generally means that we are working at breakneck speed, thinking that somehow, once these tasks are done, then some of the less stressful jobs can be taken on.
Somehow, that rarely happens. Living at this type of stress level can play havoc with you physically, emotionally and spiritually as well. While I can’t speak for the actual physical detriment of high stress living, I know that I have suffered from physical and emotional issues which have been caused by stress.
My last job (apart from the businesses I have run since) was a high stress position that required an enormous amount of travel. I joked that I had made Platinum status just on my travel between Los Angeles and Silicone Valley.
But seriously, I did. That didn’t include travel to spots around the country and to other countries as well. Just the travel was enough to bring an enormous level of stress to my life, let alone that I was negotiating multi-million dollars software contracts for a well-known software company. At first, the travel was exciting but it became not only tedious but something I began to dread. Before I would even leave, I wanted to be home again. I was also exhausted and feeling defeated before I even left.
It came to a screeching halt for me when my son became ill and passed away. I no longer had any desire to leave my home base. I wanted nothing more than to spend my time with my family. When the travel began to ramp up again, I waited a full year before quitting my job just to be sure it wasn’t an over reaction to my son’s passing. When I told my doctor that I had quit, all he said was, “Thank God. That job was killing you.”
However, it didn’t take me long to build my stress level back up somewhat. I had started a successful company and used the enormous work it entailed as a way to hide and let my emotions work themselves out after the loss of my son. It took six years before my husband and I decided to shut it down and let others take over the market. I wasn’t dedicated to it and they were. Again, my levels of stress reduced.
We moved to Texas and, while my work stress was gone, suddenly I had physical stress due to many allergies that I did not previously know existed. The worst of these is from something called Mountain Cedar. We lived in the nature preserve area of Austin where these trees grew in wild abandon. The allergy is so bad, it is considered a toxin and it was for me. While in Austin, I started yet another company. This one was fun and the stress was not bad at all.
When it became unbearable after seven years (and my husband started exhibited symptoms), we moved to North Texas. While the Cedar fever ramped down, suddenly I was confronted by another range of trees and my own drive to accomplish more. While I shut down the last business so I could take care of my grandson (who had heart surgery at six weeks old), I turned instead to writing reviews.
I thought it would be fun to express my opinion about products I used. However, living in the stress lane meant I ramped it up way too much.
Between the allergies and the writing, I stopped taking care of myself. I had some physical issues which changed my diet dramatically and not for the better. After gall bladder surgery, I ended up with only a short list of about ten items I could eat. To give you an idea, two of those were soda crackers and graham crackers. No vegetables, no fruits, very little protein. I could tolerate some soft green salad mixes but only with vinegar.
Between stress and malnutrition diet, I was an accident waiting to happen. I was finally diagnosed with GERD and put on medicine which allowed me to eat once again after four years. It wasn’t that I ate too much, it was that I was eating at all that put twenty pounds on me within three months.
So there I was, overweight, stressed but finally able to eat some foods (not all, I still have a short list but it includes some good foods as well.) All it took was the administration of a drug that I can’t tolerate to almost kill me. When a doctor looks you in the eye and tells you to quickly get your affairs in order, you take it seriously. Especially if you are in the hospital and one step away from being put on a ventilator.
I was thankful to have that opportunity to reconnect with my younger brother. We had been living estranged for way too long. I could not bear the idea that he would have to live (after I died) thinking we should have made up our differences.
So, there I was, in the hospital while they ran every test they could think of and administered massive doses of medicines that might help. The thing is, I didn’t die. I got better (relatively.) I was able to go home after a nine day stay but on oxygen and weak as can be.
While we still are working through it all and figuring out what type of life we will live, the thing is that, for the first time in decades, my stress level is gone. I take each day as it comes. I don’t worry about tomorrow. I’m finding all the lower level tasks that would have been enjoyable now fill my day to the level I want and can cope with.
What changed wasn’t just my life’s circumstances. It wasn’t as if I had an epiphany about how to deal with life. Left to my own inclinations, I would probably ramp back up with stress and problems.
Instead, I looked to my Creator and started living the life He wanted for me. I look each day for what I am to do based on His will and His way. Somedays are busier than others but that works out okay. It is never too much or too hard. In some ways, I am being stretched in ways I never thought I would do. Those have turned out to be the most satisfactory work (other than raising my children) that I have every accomplished.
God wants the best for each of us. That begins with understanding the need for and the acceptance of the saving grace of Jesus Christ. Once we are aligned with God spiritually, He can do wonderful things in our lives despite the circumstances we find ourselves in.
That doesn’t mean life is a bed of roses. Sometimes, it is far from that. It means that He can give us the ability to live through trying times and still find the joy and peace and thankfulness that comes from Him and Him alone.
I’m so thankful to be alive and to be living a life that has meaning and purpose. I now give thanks in all my circumstances knowing that God has His plan for me and it is unfolding in beautiful and wonderful fashion. Each day is a gift that is not to be taken lightly. Each night is a time for reflection and rest. My life is full and I am so happy to be able to share it with you. My prayer is that you will find it helpful to you as you search for or walk with the Lord.
Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”